How It All Started ?
I love Tarot. I have use it for many different purposes.
And here is my story.
Our house was built before WWII when Gdańsk was then The Free City of Danzig. After the war the place was called Lehmkaule, before that it was called Grosse Molde. Many of the people who lived on our street spoke Polish and German.
The street is long and every house has a sizable back garden. My grandmother knew everyone. Nothing got past her. And she often took me with her when she went for a bit of gossip.
Because I was under their feet, they would usually send me into the garden or find something to do. Still, I was a very curious child and always wanted to see what they were up to. So apart from chattering, drinking coffee and smoking, they were doing cards. Two of our neighbours read playing cards and Tarot, and I loved it.
I was always watching and listening to them doing readings. Around fourteen or fifteen I began drawing my own Tarot deck. Not detailed images, but symbols. I had an inner sense of what they meant. So that was my introduction to what some may call esoteric knowledge, the occult, mixed with old pagan ways and witchery.
This sparked a lifelong journey into esoteric knowledge.
The Meat and Potatos
So…. from early on, I was able to see, experience, and do things that others could not. Moreover, I had very little to no control over them. I was overwhelmed and scared by it all. As a teenager, there was a great deal of activity around me, including what some describe as poltergeist activity.
Everything I learned, I learned on my own, through trial and error. It took me years and years to not be scared, stop reacting, and simply observe. Even though I can do mediumship, it is not something I practise.
The key for me was to find the way that worked for me. How to effectively manage my own thoughts, feelings, fears, and therefore my own field. It is still an ongoing the process,
I did many silly things, as you do when embarking on a trial and error journey. I am curious by nature—and yes, curiosity killed the cat. My approach was let’s try it and see "What will happen if I do this?" And then I had to deal with whatever unfolded. As a result, I learned through direct experience and consequence. The hard way.
Especially when I embarked on my journey with Ayahuasca for a considerable period of time. It was indeed a beautiful, transformative and challenging experience. At one point I wanted to make the Amazon my home. And believe me you, this not for everyone.
It takes time to learn how to navigate it. It can at times be mind-blowing ecstatic and at other times absolutely brutal. On many occasions, I witnessed things that defied the laws of physics as we know them.
Contrary to popular belief, it is not all rainbows and unicorns, as it is often portrayed. Behind the veil are many things out there, and that is why I have enormous respect for so called “unseen”.
Not only because I can see it more often than not, but because I have experienced those forces first hand.
